I think a good movie would be one about a whole bunch of wild bears who came into the city to attack city people, but then they get caught up in the hustle-bustle of city life, and they never get around to killing any people, and then the movie would end with, like, a montage of these saddened bears in their 9-to-5 jobs they got stuck in, looking off into the distance thinking about what could’ve been, and there’d be some song in the background, like “Everybody Hurts”, but not “Everybody Hurts” because everybody uses that. I would call the movie: “The Sidetracked Bears”.
Or maybe rather than kill people, they had come to the city spread their gospel, like missionaries, and they would go to the people’s apartments, and try to tell them how great their little bear religion was, but the people wouldn’t understand (because they spoke people-talk, not bear-talk), and so their religion would fail (because of the awful ratings), and they’d end up selling flowers in airports. And then I think maybe it’d be called: “The Misdirected Bears”. Missionaries are lame. That’s clear. So maybe if instead of religion, they came to sell stuff. They’re salesmen bears. Salesbears. And they have to make a quota by a certain date, you know, they have to sell a certain amount by a certain date, or else they get evicted. From their… forest. By their…. land… landlordbear. Landbear. Lordbear. Landbearlord. It’s called: “The Salesmen Bears”.
All right, it’s obvious “The Salesmen Bears” has a lot of semantical problems (re: landbearlord), but now, I’ve got it, I’ve got it. They come to the city to spread news that this asteroid is going to hit the earth, and they’re trying to warn people about it, but they run into a language barrier (see earlier ideas on “people-talk” and “bear-talk”), so it’s really difficult; plus, no one wants to hear about some asteriod coming to blow them up, so it’s a tough message to get out.
I’ll call it: “The Bad News Bears”.
They’ve done that? Little-league baseball?
Shit.
