Yesterday I had an interesting dream. I was waiting in a line. We were waiting to meditate. We were all waiting in a long line, and when you got to the front of the line, you went to either the right or the left, and you meditated. But we had to keep the line moving, ... More »

A lot of you out there may think you like Carlos Santana. A lot of you are wrong. Dead wrong. You think you like Carlos Santana. You think, "He’s a great guitarist." You think, "I’m really into his sound." You don’t like Carlos Santana. I know, I know. You think you do. But ask yourself ... More »

Sometimes you really have to step back and look at the amazing and incredible advances in technology we have available to us these days. Take the Internet… please! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!! HA HA HA ha ha ha HA!!! (please read each "ha", it’s essential that you do) No, really, seriously, ... More »

Went out to dinner the other day. I ordered the salmon. Three cups of coffee later the waiter brings out a large hot plate with a steamin’ pile of fish. "The hell’s this?" I snapped. "It is your order, sir, the sa-" he stammered. "I ordered salmon." A brief pause as we sized each other ... More »

I just saw a guy being driven around in a black car. If you’d ever like to look like a badass, buy a black car and get someone to drive you around in it. Everywhere you go, people will wonder: "Is that guy/gal in the government? Is he/she in some sort of secretive high-level position ... More »