Things that are tagged Twilight

Know where he is?

Posted on February 1, 2010 by Porter Mason

comic strip | panel 1 - JOEL: I’m an A&R rep with Hancock. I’m here for a publicity thing with one of the shirtless Twilight kids. His name is… It’s “Ayok” I think. |comic strip | panel 2 - JOEL: Do you know where he is? CLUB MANAGER: Wwe get the Twilight guys in here a lot. They’re easy to spot. |comic strip | panel 3 - CLUB MANAGER: Any guy you see who’s constantly getting a handjob, he’s in Twilight. JOEL: Oh my. So… one of those three over there then. |comic strip | panel 4 - JOEL: What about the kid getting the blowjob? CLUB MANAGER: He’s peripherally related to the Jonas Brothers. |

Meeting Twilight guy

Posted on February 8, 2010 by Porter Mason

comic strip | panel 1 - JOEL: Hi, are you “Ayok”? I’m from Hancock Records. I’m here to sign you. AYOK: Grnlk brzlm. TONY KING: I’m Ayok’s agent. He says “cool.” |comic strip | panel 2 - JOEL: I’m sorry… Is he speaking… ENGLISH? AYOK: Ssfsdsd kRYyN… TONY KING: Ayok speaks his own brand of edgy young English. You’ll get used to it. |comic strip | panel 3 - JOEL: Is he… is he OK? AYOK: Shkbrs wprprd. TONY KING: Look, the kid’s in TWILIGHT. He’s a fucking shirtless GOLDMINE. Don’t rock the boat, OK? |comic strip | panel 4 - HANDJOB GIRL: Excuse me… can- can I please give him another handjob? AYOK: Aoosdk sdwr. TONY KING: Make it quick. |

Planning Ayok's signing

Posted on February 12, 2010 by Porter Mason

comic strip | panel 1 - JOEL: Your client is getting a recording contract with us. I guess we’re supposed to have the press take photos of the signing tonight. |comic strip | panel 2 - AYOK: Pmgs sffj. JOEL: Should we do it onstage? Right when he finishes his set? TONY KING: He’s not doing a set. He can’t sing or play music. |comic strip | panel 3 - JOEL: Well. That’ll make recording interesting. TONY KING: Pput a sticker on the CD that says “Some Guy from Twilight”. We’ll be OK. |comic strip | panel 4 - AYOK: Akmdf! AOKOKGIIFNFNSR!!! JOEL: He… seems to be having some sort of SEIZURE. TONY KING: He’s fine. He just needs another vodka and Ambien. |